Social wings

Breckyn, I am convinced, was born a quiet, mild, and reserved baby. She didn't cry often in public. She was content as long as she was with mommy and daddy. She never had a tantrum... and even her first "fit" wasn't until about 24 months. As one of my friend's sister's describes her, Breckyn is a 'real life doll.' You know, we get to dress her, feed her, love her, and she's just sweet as can be. [This first paragraph, however, is aptly limited to the first two years of life. Hellloooo three years old! ;) ] 

One thing about my sweet girl is that she takes some time to warm up to situations. And that is perfectly fine with me. I feel like she is one that will grow and ease her way into what she needs to in her own time... she'll still get 'there'... it will just be in her unique time table. And most particularly in the area of socializing. People have referred to her as a 'shy' little girl. I don't really like that stigma as I think little kids pick up on what people label them and start to own those titles. I prefer to say she's reserved. I think it fits Breckyn better, anyhow. 

Well, today we were at our local neighborhood park enjoying the beautiful beginnings of Spring. The park was quiet and no one was on the swings or play area for quite some time, which was appreciated since I was managing all three kids.

Shortly into our time there, a mom and her three children arrive. The older two were boys who were a bit roudy on the play equipment and eventually ended up playing baseball on the grassy area. Her youngest was a little girl, age four. 

Breckyn is an observer. So initially, she observed the family, the little girl, their dog, and the boys playing ball. At one point she said, "Mommy, I want to play ball with those boys." I explained to her that because they are bigger boys, they play with a ball that isn't as soft as she is used to, and that they are playing a game just for them. She continued to watch. 

After several more moments of watching she said, "Mommy, I want to say hi to that little girl." Within moments the little girl walked over to where her dog was tied to a tree and out of no where Breckyn said, "Hi." .... "Hi," the little girl replied. "My name is Breckyn." Quiet... as I am internally crossing my fingers the little girl will reply again. I know this is a brave moment for Breckyn and I want her to see her effort is worthwhile. "My name is Riley," she says. Phewww.. deep breath from mom. 

Then Riley runs back over to her family in the grassy area. Breckyn then tells me, "Mommy, I want to play with her." I said, "All you have to do is ask her if she wants to play. I'll come with you if you'd like me to." Then, without any further prompting, Breckyn boldly walks away from me onto the grass and has a little conversation with Riley. They then both turn back towards me and Breckyn says as she passes me, "Mom, Riley is going to play with me because I asked." 

And it worked like magic in Breckyn's world. First, the swings, then a quick ride down the slide, and finally off to the rocks for some make-believe. A part of me felt terrible for having to leave the park. It was time for us to go, and Breckyn took it quite well. I was worried she'd be sad to leave her new found friend. But as we left she said, "Bye Riley. Thanks for playing with me!" 

Then all night long we heard snippets of Breckyn's new 'friend' Riley. She also is under the firm belief that Riley will be at the park the next time we go there. I am secretly hoping so, too. 

I am proud of you for spreading your wings today, Miss B. You are getting so big and so brave. 

I love you.